The Importance Of Communication For Sex
No matter what kind of relationship you are in, communication is the key to success. It is even more important in any kind of sexual relationship.
Let's be honest, nobody teaches us about sex, or how to communicate about likes or dislikes. Everybody kind of wings it, it sometimes works in our favour, it sometimes doesn't. If it doesn't work in our favour, it could lead to dissatisfaction in our sex life, which can cause issues within relationships, as well as the possibility of dissatisfaction with your life in general.
While I totally understand that it can be difficult to open up and discuss this with your partner, try to remember, they are probably just as nervous as you!
The easiest way to have these conversations is by using simple questions that require only a yes or no answer. For example, you could ask "do you like that?". This is a completely simple and easy question which you could use over and over until you're comfortable with a little harder questions.
Once you get the hang of the easier questions, you can elaborate into more in-depth questions. For example, you could ask "do you prefer X or Z?"
No matter what question you are asking, you could do this during sex, after sex or even in a completely neutral situation.
Remember that while the questioning is probably difficult, it is very important to respect your partner's likes and dislikes and their guidance. Respecting their communication will grow a stronger connection between the two of you.
"This gentle approach opens the door to communicating about other areas of life as well. You’ll also find that after doing this a few times it will be easier to talk about sex in a more open and honest way". - (Jonti Searll, sensualist).